During a recent road trip, where I was traveling through Michigan, I ran out of gas. Unfortunately my 2007 Dodge Charger R/T with the optional Road & Track performance package is not equipped with an EVIC that will display the miles until empty like many other vehicles from your company including the Daytona Charger of the same year which has this EVIC and is of similar tier and price range and even my sister’s much older model Jeep Liberty of lesser cost.

So what did I do while stranded in Michigan you ask? Well, despite having AAA Roadside assistance, I decided to brave the side of the interstate like any red-blooded American would do. I was in Michigan, the state that birthed the American auto, so certainly someone would see my plight, stop, and help. So I put on my hazard signals, got out my gas can, and waited… No one stopped.

I called a few gas stations that my iPhone showed me were in my vicinity and began asking the gas station attendants if there were any customers who’d be able to assist me in getting fuel and getting on my way, as I was doubtful of my surroundings.

Finally I dialed a place that put me on speakerphone where a man began to toy with me like a housecat with a mouse. He had the temerity to tell me I would have to pay him $20.00 just to get in his truck. Then he said he’d require another $20.00 to bring me back to the side of the road being the “Christian Michigander” that he was. “Why not just say no?!” I thought to myself as he continued along a line I decided was unfit for a Christian.

By this time I was livid. I told him “Wait right there…” I wanted to see what this guy was all about since having fun at my expense knowingly dismissing the danger posed to a young man who was calling at night stranded alongside on the interstate.

I went to my trunk stripped down to my plum crazy colored, Mopar-inspired Diesel boxer briefs as cars whizzed past, then put on my running shorts, Mizuno running shoes, two sweatshirts, and my hat. I grabbed my gas can, and locked my dog inside the car, left the hazard lights flashing then began to run the three miles at my fast pace (sub six minute miles for those who are wondering) to show this guy (who was probably spitting his chewing tobacco into a plastic soda bottle and scratching lottery tickets laughing in his tomfoolery unaware) that he was about to be confronted by the once stranded young man who would help anyone who asked for it no matter the cost or danger to me without asking for a dime in return like he believes any self-respecting person would do.

So as I was running at a mad dash I was thinking, “Man, this guy. I can’t believe it! When I get ahold of him!” Now, I realize this wouldn’t have even been happening if I had had something in my vehicle to help my gauge exactly how much gas I had left, but my mind, at that time, was focused on the matter at hand: teaching this fool some good-old fashioned manners by fisticuffs.

My vehicle is completely paid for and as I was running I was wishing I had waited to buy the SRT-8 in either the Dodge Charger or the Challenger… and as I continued to my assault I realized… this guy’s impending reckoning would make for a really good Dodge-Mopar commercial. In fact… As I was running I was feeling like detouring from returning to Cleveland and stopping in Detroit to pay Daimler-Chrysler a visit in order to share my experience and see if the Daimler-Chrysler corporation would equip my 2007 Dodge Charger R/T/R&t with the EVIC that I am talking about from the other model Chargers to gauge how much gasoline remains before I am stranded again.

So what happened with the guy at the gas station I was running towards? Well lucky for him he was gone when I arrived about twenty minutes later. He knew he was done for and when I found that he wasn’t there I walked over to the Dollar Store nearby and I bought a Holy Bible, turned to the parable of the Good Samaritan, I highlighted the passage, and then included a note reading: “This isn’t over.”

Anyways, to make a long story short… I am not only writing to rehash the craziness that occurred, nor am I writing to tell you that I am unsatisfied with the product. I love my car in many ways and I want to keep it in my arsenal for a long time to come… but for the price tag on the vehicle that I should be able to at least install the EVIC I want for the vehicle; especially since it’s already in the Daytona of similar price and in many more of your vehicles like I mentioned, in the Jeep Liberty… Unfortunately after some internet searching I’ve learned that I cannot even get the EVIC from a junk yard to install because it doesn’t just plug in like that so I’m sort of in a quandary and looking to The Chrysler Corporation/Dodge/Mopar/Fiat like I would look to a big brother, father, or grandfather for some help with this matter.

I would like to propose that you utilize this experience as payment and turn it into a story, perhaps take many stories like this from owners of your vehicles and ask them to contribute online and utilize them to reinforce why it is we drive the cars we drive and spawn more people to get into the spirit… the unbridled spirit of taking their vehicles and turning them into something amazing.

Not only would this make a super rad commercial… but it tells a great story about how people are always there to help the needy and if someone’s trying to make a buck off those in need… there is always a decent human being will run to their aid (in this case, literally) to give their assailant a swift kick in the rear. This is the unbridled spirit of the muscle car and the man who drives one. You could depict this scene in a commercial like… “This maniac actually wrote a letter and drove to us to trade in his car, so for a good laugh, we actually complied. We love our drivers! We love Dodge people!“ People love this kind of stuff!

Everyone thinks I’m crazy for doing this, however I’m writing sincerely to share this experience with you as it’s one that I don’t believe I would have had without your vehicle. It was a good adrenaline rush, however, I need my car to behave properly. I look forward to your response and would appreciate a face-to-face when you can accommodate me. If I have not received a response by December 9th, I will call to determine if the parties addressed have received this letter. If I have not heard back from the recipients further communication will ensue.